| couples therapy questions at home: Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay Mira Kirshenbaum, 1997-07-01 There are many books that promise to help you fix a bad relationship. This groundbreaking bestseller is the first one to help you choose whether you should even try—or if you need to go. Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems: • What sins are forgivable and which ones are unpardonable? • Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself? • What is your sex life really like, and how important is it? • Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable? Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line—what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship—and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Our Love Is Too Good to Feel So Bad Mira Kirshenbaum, 1998 We just don't know how to make each other happy any more. ''Sex used to be really good. Now it doesn't go right at all. You don't suddenly lose the ability to make scrambled eggs. So why would we forget how to make love? We can't seem to talk without fighting. How did we get into this? I know what we're mad about, but I don't know why things keep making us so mad. Many of us have had experiences like these. Something's wrong--perhaps seriously wrong--but it's a complete mystery why a once-healthy relationship is now in trouble. You're tired of working unproductively on it, you're tired of feeling so confused, and you're tired of solutions that seem complicated and irrelevant. You deserve to know what your real couples problem is and what to do to solve it. This book does something that no book has ever done before. It shows you how to sort through all the pain and confusion in your relationship, put your finger on exactly what's been causing all the troubles, and find the precise way to eliminate them. For the first time, psychotherapist and bestselling author Mira Kirshenbaum has identified ten love killers that cause all the pain and mysterious problems couples get into. By answering simple questions, you'll be able to diagnose your individual case and identify the love killers responsible for your specific problems. We just don't know how to make each other happy any more. ''Sex used to be really good. Now it doesn't go right at all. You don't suddenly lose the ability to make scrambled eggs. So why would we forget how to make love? We can't seem to talk without fighting. How did we get into this? I know what we're mad about, but I don't know why things keep making us so mad. Many of us have had experiences like these. Something's wrong--perhaps seriously wrong--but it's a complete mystery why a once-healthy relationship is now in trouble. You're tired of working unproductively on it, you're tired of feeling so confused, and you're tired of solutions that seem complicated and irrelevant. You deserve to know what your real couples problem is and what to do to solve it. This book does something that no book has ever done before. It shows you how to sort through all the pain and confusion in your relationship, put your finger on exactly what's been causing all the troubles, and find the precise way to eliminate them. For the first time, psychotherapist and bestselling author Mira Kirshenbaum has identified ten love killers that cause all the pain and mysterious problems couples get into. By answering simple questions, you'll be able to diagnose your individual case and identify the love killers responsible for your specific problems. |
| couples therapy questions at home: In Quest of the Mythical Mate Ellyn Bader, Peter Pearson, 2013-05-13 In Quest of the Mythical Mate presents a valuable and fertile developmental model for diagnosing and treating couples that is flexible enough to incorporate a wide variety of intervention strategies, yet purposeful enough to give a clear sense of direction to couples in distress. As such, this volume provides a powerful therapeutic approach for all professionals who treat couples. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Couples Therapy Workbook Kathleen Mates-Youngman, LMFT, 2014-10-01 Couples Therapy Workbook is a series of guided questions to promote meaningful couple conversations and build ongoing, connected communication. The core of this unique guide is 30 guided conversations of the most critical relationship struggles. For each of the 30 topics, there is an introduction, goal-setting strategies and 10 scripted questions to ask each other - all presented in an easy-to-use mindful style. Set in a weekly format over 30 days but can be tailored to any timeframe. Designed to be used to couples, and also by therapists working with couples (bonus clinician prep included with each conversation). Week 1- Who Are We? Falling in Love, Friendship, Caring, Acceptance, Empathy, Emotional Intimacy, Rituals Week 2 - Who Am I? Childhood, Family Origin, Temperament, Influences, Spirituality, Values, How I Think Week 3- How do we work? Communication, Conflict, Defensiveness, Intimacy, Trust, Fidelity and Boundaries, Parenting, Staying in Sync Week 4 - What do we want? Romance, Joy and Gratitude, respect, Apologies and Forgiveness, Challenges, Relationship Savings Account, Past, Present & Future, Keeping Connected Reviews: “What a unique resource! A treasure-trove of guided conversations to increase intimacy and friendship. Therapists often ask me for good homework assignments. This book does the thinking for you. Keep it on hand and whether its values, sex, conflict or other challenging issues, you'll have a ready-made way to help your clients make immediate progress.” -- Ellyn Bader, Ph.D, Founder/Director The Couples Institute This is a valuable resource for anyone working with couples. Any couple can profit greatly if they are willing to take Kathleen Youngman's challenge to explore these important topics and discuss these wonderful questions. -- Milan and Kay Yerkovich, Authors of best-selling How We Love series “Instead of offering analysis, advice or theory, The Couples Therapy Workbook offers just that, a set of questions to stimulate conversations that help couples deepen their engagement with each other and reconnect. All couples will find this an exceptional guide, and all therapists will find it an effective instrument to supplement the therapeutic process. I highly recommend it and complement the author on her creativity and attention to the core details of a connected relationship.” --Harville Hendrix, Ph. D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph. D.; Authors of Making Marriage Simple and Getting the Love You Want. |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work John Gottman, PhD, Nan Silver, 2015-05-05 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts Les Parrott, Leslie Parrott, 2015-10-27 OVER ONE MILLION COPIES SOLD! With this updated edition of their award-winning book, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott help you launch lifelong love like never before. This is more than a book--it's an experience, especially when you use the his/her workbooks filled with more than 40 fun exercises. Get ready for deeper intimacy with the best friend you'll ever have. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, which has been translated into more than 15 languages, is the most widely used marriage prep tool in the world. Why? Because it will help you . . . Uncover the misbeliefs of marriage Learn to communicate with instant understanding Discover the secret to resolving conflict Master the skills of money management Get your sex life off to a great start A compelling video, featuring real-life couples, is available, and with this updated edition, Les and Leslie unveil the game-changing SYMBIS Assessment. Now you can discover how to leverage your personalities for a love that lasts a lifetime. Make your marriage everything it is meant to be. Save your marriage--before (and after) it starts. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Marriage Fitness Mort Fertel, 2004 Revolutionary step by step system marriage success. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Solution Building in Couples Therapy Elliott Connie, MA, LPC, 2012-09-14 This brief volume presents the basic premises of solution building, liberally enriched with examples. This is a remarkable book, the first of its kind, radical in its message, written about couples but also suitable for all manner of referrals.--Choice: Current Reviews for Academic Libraries ìElliott Connie has written a remarkable book. Read it and you will be taken on a journey. If you are new to the world of solution focused brief therapy, beware! This book could capture your heartÖAs Elliott says from the very beginning, solution focused brief therapy is simple, so simple it is really hard to learn. And from this book, if you set out to do so, you could teach yourself how to become a competent solution focused brief therapist. It is all here, laid out clearly, packed with examples from the real world of therapy, repeated and repeated like onion skins, each repetition releasing its own flavour, a variation on a theme, a new understanding of something already known.î Chris Iveson, MA BRIEF London, UK Working with couples presents psychotherapists and counselors with a unique set of challenges, such that many therapists prefer not to work with couples or attempt to avoid it entirely. In the first book written about solution focused therapy (SFT) with couples, author Elliott Connie describes how his use of SFT made working with couples a pleasure rather than a burden. The solution focused approach is one that facilitates cooperation between partners in the creation of an agreed-upon future, rather than merely focusing on the problems that have come to define the relationship. Beginning with a clear explanation of the assumptions and tenets required for the practice of SFT, this book presents a step-by-step breakdown of exactly how to conduct solution building sessions with couples. Each chapter focuses on a different part of the therapeutic process and includes sample dialogues, techniques, and vignettes drawn from the authorís own extensive practice. Readers will feel as though they themselves are going through the therapeutic process with the couples and observing the impact of each step of the process. Numerous exercises and common solution focused questions help readers integrate this new material into their repertoire for immediate use. Key Features: Provides a unique view of couples therapy in action using the solution focused approach Includes actual questions to ask clients, sample dialogues, and sample homework assignments Features examples drawn from actual cases, illustrating techniques used in practice with real couples Presents scales to measure progress and supporting research for the application of solution-focused therapy to couples counseling |
| couples therapy questions at home: How We Love, Expanded Edition Milan Yerkovich, Kay Yerkovich, 2009-01-20 Did you know the last fight you had with your spouse began long before you even met? Are you tired of falling into frustrating relational patterns in your marriage? Do you and your spouse fight about the same things again and again? Relationship experts Milan and Kay Yerkovich explain why the ways you and your spouse relate to each other go back to before you even met. Drawing on the powerful tool of attachment theory, Milan and Kay explore how your childhood created an “intimacy imprint” that affects your marriage today. Their stories and practical ideas help you: * identify your personal love style * understand how your early life impacts you and your spouse * break free from painful patterns that keep you stuck * find healing for the source of conflict, not just the symptoms * create the close, nourishing relationship you dream about Revised throughout with all-new material and additional visual diagrams, this expanded edition of How We Love will bring vibrant life to your marriage. Are you ready for a new journey of love? Note: The revised and expanded How We Love Workbook is available separately. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Understanding and Lifting Depression Without Drugs Joe Griffin, Ivan Tyrrell, 2005 |
| couples therapy questions at home: Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy For Dummies Brent Bradley, James Furrow, 2013-07-15 A practical, down-to-earth guide to using the world's most successful approach to couple therapy One of the most successful therapeutic approaches to healing dysfunctional relationships, emotionally focused couple therapy provides clients with powerful insights into how and why they may be suppressing their emotions and teaches them practical ways to deal with those feelings more constructively for improved relationships. Unlike cognitive-behavioural therapy, which provides effective short-term coping skills, emotionally focused therapy often is prescribed as a second-stage treatment for couples with lingering emotional difficulties. Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy For Dummies introduces readers to this ground-breaking therapy, offering simple, proven strategies and tools for dealing with problems with bonding, attachment and emotions, the universal cornerstones of healthy relationships. An indispensable resource for readers who would like to manage their relationship problems independently through home study Delivers powerful techniques for dealing with unpleasant emotions, rather than repressing them and for responding constructively to complex relationship issues The perfect introduction to EFT basics for therapists considering expanding their practices to include emotionally focused therapy methods Packed with fascinating and instructive case studies and examples of EFT in action, from the authors' case files Provides valuable guidance on finding, selecting and working with the right EFT certified therapist |
| couples therapy questions at home: How to Counsel a Couple in 6 Sessions or Less H. Norman Wright, 2002-08-30 How to Counsel a Couple in 6 Sessions or Less makes it easier to counsel couples over a brief period of time, but also addresses major marital issues of communication, family issues, decision making and more. This highly practical resource for pastors - or anyne in ministry - can be used with The Marriage Checkup Questionnaire or as a stand alone tool for quickly diagnosing problems and referring couples to a professional, as necessary. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Hope-Focused Marriage Counseling Everett L. Worthington Jr., 2013-02-04 Everett L. Worthington Jr. offers a comprehensive manual for assisting couples over common rough spots and through serious problems in a manner that is compassionate, effective and brief. |
| couples therapy questions at home: What Makes Love Last? John Gottman, John Mordechai Gottman, Nan Silver, 2013-09-10 One of the foremost relationship experts at work today offers creative insight on building trust and avoiding betrayal, helping readers to decode the mysteries of healthy love and relationships-- |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Hard Questions Susan Piver, 2021-06-22 A revised and expanded edition of the classic relationship book that has helped thousands of couples shape a shared vision for their lives together. With this simple-yet-profound relationship tool, Susan Piver shows couples at any stage of their relationships--whether they are considering engagement, have been married for decades, or just want to deepen their connection--how they can forge and strengthen lasting, intimate bonds. Focusing on key areas such as home, money, work, community, and family, The Hard Questions contains 100 thought-provoking questions for couples to ask each other, including: • What will our home look like? • What are our professional goals? • How do you feel about sharing our life on social media? • Will we try to have children, and if so, when? The Hard Questions provides couples with guidance and support for having the kind of conversations that will lead them to a deeper understanding of each other and a happy, healthy, and prosperous future together. |
| couples therapy questions at home: How to Not Die Alone Logan Ury, 2021-02-02 A “must-read” (The Washington Post) funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams. Have you ever looked around and wondered, “Why has everyone found love except me?” You’re not the only one. Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives—they’re the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love. Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn’t lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how. This “simple-to-use guide” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories. You’ll learn: -What’s holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern) -What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn’t) -How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you) -How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love) -How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews) -Why “the spark” is a myth (but you’ll find love anyway) This “data-driven” (Time), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Loving with the Brain in Mind: Neurobiology and Couple Therapy (Norton Series on Interpersonal Neurobiology) Mona DeKoven Fishbane, 2013-09-30 Facilitating change in couple therapy by understanding how the brain works to maintain—and break—old habits. Human brains and behavior are shaped by genetic predispositions and early experience. But we are not doomed by our genes or our past. Neuroscientific discoveries of the last decade have provided an optimistic and revolutionary view of adult brain function: People can change. This revelation about neuroplasticity offers hope to therapists and to couples seeking to improve their relationship. Loving With the Brain in Mind explores ways to help couples become proactive in revitalizing their relationship. It offers an in-depth understanding of the heartbreaking dynamics in unhappy couples and the healthy dynamics of couples who are flourishing. Sharing her extensive clinical experience and an integrative perspective informed by neuroscience and relationship science, Mona Fishbane gives us insight into the neurobiology underlying couples’ dances of reactivity. Readers will learn how partners become reactive and emotionally dysregulated with each other, and what is going on in their brains when they do. Clear and compelling discussions are included of the neurobiology of empathy and how empathy and selfregulation can be learned. Understanding neurobiology, explains Fishbane, can transform your clinical practice with couples and help you hone effective therapeutic interventions. This book aims to empower therapists— and the couples they treat—as they work to change interpersonal dynamics that drive them apart. Understanding how the brain works can inform the therapist’s theory of relationships, development, and change. And therapists can offer clients “neuroeducation” about their own reactivity and relationship distress and their potential for personal and relational growth. A gifted clinician and a particularly talented neuroscience writer, Dr. Fishbane presents complex material in an understandable and engaging manner. By anchoring her work in clinical cases, she never loses sight of the people behind the science. |
| couples therapy questions at home: The SAGE Encyclopedia of Marriage, Family, and Couples Counseling Jon Carlson, Shannon B. Dermer, 2016-09-15 The SAGE Encyclopedia of Marriage, Family and Couples Counseling is a new, all-encompassing, landmark work for researchers seeking to broaden their knowledge of this vast and diffuse field. Marriage and family counseling programs are established at institutions worldwide, yet there is no current work focused specifically on family therapy. While other works have discussed various methodologies, cases, niche aspects of the field and some broader views of counseling in general, this authoritative Encyclopedia provides readers with a fully comprehensive and accessible reference to aid in understanding the full scope and diversity of theories, approaches, and techniques and how they address various life events within the unique dynamics of families, couples, and related interpersonal relationships. Key topics include: Assessment Communication Coping Diversity Interventions and Techniques Life Events/Transitions Sexuality Work/Life Issues, and more Key features include: More than 500 signed articles written by key figures in the field span four comprehensive volumes Front matter includes a Reader’s Guide that groups related entries thematically Back matter includes a history of the development of the field, a Resource Guide to key associations, websites, and journals, a selected Bibliography of classic publications, and a detailed Index All entries conclude with Further Readings and Cross References to related entries to aid the reader in their research journey |
| couples therapy questions at home: Communication Miracles for Couples Jonathan Robinson, 2012-08-23 New York Times Bestseller! ─ Restore Your Relationship, Enhance Your Marriage Cultivate effective communication and a lasting relationship. Communication Miracles for Couples by psychotherapist, popular professional speaker, and bestselling author Jonathan Robinson has helped hundreds of thousands of couples repair their relationships and their marriages. Continuously in print since 1997, Communication Miracles for Couples has sold over 100,000 copies. Whether you are looking to enhance your relationship or want to resolve existing conflict, successful techniques taught by Jonathan Robinson can help you develop effective communication and a lasting relationship with a spouse or partner. Honeymoon gift, anniversary gift, or just a gift for him or her. Create lasting harmony and keep love alive with Jonathan Robinson's powerful and effective methods for relationship communication. He has reached over 250 million people around the world with his practical methods, and his work has been translated into 47 languages. Learn how to enhance your relationship by learning to communicate with less blame and more understanding. Find a deeper happiness in your relationship: • Feel totally loved • Never argue again • Have your partner really hear you • Repair broken trust If you have read books such as 4 Essential Keys to Effective Communication in Love, Life, Work─Anywhere; The 5 Love Languages; Mindful Relationship Habits; Communication in Marriage; or Couple Skills; you will love what Jonathan Robinson’s Communication Miracles for Couples does for your relationship. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Exaholics Lisa Marie Bobby, 2016-02-10 Severing a cherished relationship is one of the most painful experiences in life—and cutting those emotional ties to a loved one can feel almost like ending an addiction. Up till now, people recovering from other problems were able to get real help—like AA and rehab—while those struggling in the aftermath of traumatic breaks dealt with platitudes and friends insisting they should get over it already. But now Exaholics Anonymous treats getting over an ex like kicking a chemical habit. Written by counselor and therapist Dr. Lisa Bobby, Exaholics offers meaningful support and advice to anyone trapped in the obsessive pain of a broken, or dying, attachment. She helps the brokenhearted heal, showing them, on a deep level, how to develop a conceptual framework for their experience, understand the emotional processes at work inside themselves, find the path to recovery, and free themselves of shame, injured ego, and remorse. In-depth case studies of others' journeys will illuminate the way to future happiness. |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Solution Focused Marriage: 5 Simple Habits That Will Bring Out the Best in Your Relationship Elliott Connie, 2013-06-28 Whether a couple is simply in a rut or on the verge of divorce, there are five habits that can turn things around and bring out the absolute best in any relationship. Drawn from years of working with thousands of couples, Elliott Connie explains how these five habits, can transform a relationship in the most amzing ways. Using stories and exercises, Elliott demonstrates how to successfully implement the habits into one's own relationship and experience positive benefits immediately. Elliott Connie is a solution focused therapist with a private practice based in Keller, Texas. Elliott has traveled throughout the United States and Europe, including the UK, Sweden, and Canada, training psychotherapists to work more effectively with couples, and helping couples to build more satisfying relationships. To learn more about Elliott, visit www.elliottspeaks.com. |
| couples therapy questions at home: A Roadmap for Couple Therapy Arthur C. Nielsen, 2016-06-17 A Roadmap for Couple Therapy offers a comprehensive, flexible, and user-friendly template for conducting couple therapy. Grounded in an in-depth review of the clinical and research literature, and drawing on the author’s 40-plus years of experience, it describes the three main approaches to conceptualizing couple distress and treatment—systemic, psychodynamic, and behavioral—and shows how they can be integrated into a model that draws on the best of each. Unlike multi-authored texts in which each chapter presents a distinct brand of couple therapy, this book simultaneously engages multiple viewpoints and synthesizes them into a coherent model. Covering fundamentals and advanced techniques, it speaks to both beginning therapists and experienced clinicians. Therapists will find A Roadmap for Couple Therapy an invaluable resource as they help distressed couples repair and revitalize their relationships. |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Relationship Alphabet Zach Brittle, 2015-07-07 The Relationship Alphabet is an alphabetical survey of relationship topics based on the research of Dr. John Gottman. The book includes insights on communication, conflict management and friendship building. Practical discussion questions make it easy to turn ideas into action. |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Five Love Languages Gary Chapman, 2009-12-17 Marriage should be based on love, right? But does it seem as though you and your spouse are speaking two different languages? #1 New York Times bestselling author Dr. Gary Chapman guides couples in identifying, understanding, and speaking their spouse's primary love language-quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch. By learning the five love languages, you and your spouse will discover your unique love languages and learn practical steps in truly loving each other. Chapters are categorized by love language for easy reference, and each one ends with simple steps to express a specific language to your spouse and guide your marriage in the right direction. A newly designed love languages assessment will help you understand and strengthen your relationship. You can build a lasting, loving marriage together. Gary Chapman hosts a nationally syndicated daily radio program called A Love Language Minute that can be heard on more than 150 radio stations as well as the weekly syndicated program Building Relationships with Gary Chapman, which can both be heard on fivelovelanguages.com. The Five Love Languages is a consistent New York Times bestseller - with over 5 million copies sold and translated into 38 languages. This book is a sales phenomenon, with each year outselling the prior for 16 years running! |
| couples therapy questions at home: The Angry Therapist John Kim, 2017-04-18 Tackling relationships, career, and family issues, John Kim, LMFT, thinks of himself as a life-styledesigner, not a therapist. His radical new approach, that he sometimes calls “self-help in a shot glass” is easy, real, and to the point. He helps people make changes to their lives so that personal growth happens organically, just by living. Let’s face it, therapy is a luxury. Few of us have the time or money to devote to going to an office every week. With anecdotes illustrating principles in action (in relatable and sometimes irreverent fashion) and stand-alone practices and exercises, Kim gives readers the tools and directions to focus on what's right with them instead of what's wrong. When John Kim was going through the end of a relationship, he began blogging as The Angry Therapist, documenting his personal journey post-divorce. Traditional therapists avoid transparency, but Kim preferred the language of me too as opposed to you should. He blogged about his own shortcomings, revelations, views on relationships, and the world. He spoke a different therapeutic language —open, raw, and at times subversive — and people responded. The Angry Therapist blog, that inspired this book, has been featured in The Atlantic Monthly and on NPR. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Fair Play Eve Rodsky, 2021-01-05 AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A REESE'S BOOK CLUB PICK Tired, stressed, and in need of more help from your partner? Imagine running your household (and life!) in a new way... It started with the Sh*t I Do List. Tired of being the “shefault” parent responsible for all aspects of her busy household, Eve Rodsky counted up all the unpaid, invisible work she was doing for her family—and then sent that list to her husband, asking for things to change. His response was...underwhelming. Rodsky realized that simply identifying the issue of unequal labor on the home front wasn't enough: She needed a solution to this universal problem. Her sanity, identity, career, and marriage depended on it. The result is Fair Play: a time- and anxiety-saving system that offers couples a completely new way to divvy up domestic responsibilities. Rodsky interviewed more than five hundred men and women from all walks of life to figure out what the invisible work in a family actually entails and how to get it all done efficiently. With 4 easy-to-follow rules, 100 household tasks, and a series of conversation starters for you and your partner, Fair Play helps you prioritize what's important to your family and who should take the lead on every chore, from laundry to homework to dinner. “Winning” this game means rebalancing your home life, reigniting your relationship with your significant other, and reclaiming your Unicorn Space—the time to develop the skills and passions that keep you interested and interesting. Stop drowning in to-dos and lose some of that invisible workload that's pulling you down. Are you ready to try Fair Play? Let's deal you in. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy Gina Pera, Arthur L. Robin, 2016-01-08 Since ADHD became a well-known condition, decades ago, much of the research and clinical discourse has focused on youth. In recent years, attention has expanded to the realm of adult ADHD and the havoc it can wreak on many aspects of adult life, including driving safety, financial management, education and employment, and interpersonal difficulties. Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy breaks new ground in explaining and suggesting approaches for treating the range of challenges that ADHD can create within a most important and delicate relationship: the intimate couple. With the help of contributors who are experts in their specialties, Pera and Robin provide the clinician with a step-by-step, nuts-and-bolts approach to help couples enhance their relationship and improve domestic cooperation. This comprehensive guide includes psychoeducation, medication guidelines, cognitive interventions, co-parenting techniques, habit change and communication strategies, and ADHD-specific clinical suggestions around sexuality, money, and cyber-addictions. More than twenty detailed case studies provide real-life examples of ways to implement the interventions. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Hold Me Tight Dr. Sue Johnson, 2008-04-08 Strengthen and deepen your relationships with this much-needed (Harville Hendrix, PhD) guide that has sold over one million copies, through revelatory practical exercises, seven profound conversations, and sage advice from “the best couple’s therapist in the world” (John Gottman, PhD, bestselling author) Are you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? We all want a lifetime of love, support, and companionship. But sometimes we need a little help. Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and “the most original contributor to couple’s therapy to come along in the last thirty years,” according to Dr. William J. Doherty, PhD. In Hold Me Tight, Dr. Johnson shares her groundbreaking and remarkably successful program for creating stronger, more secure relationships. The message of Hold Me Tight is simple: Forget about learning how to argue better, analyzing your early childhood, making grand romantic gestures, or experimenting with new sexual positions. Instead, get to the emotional underpinnings of your relationship by recognizing that you are emotionally attached to and dependent on your partner in much the same way that a child is on a parent for nurturing, soothing, and protection. Dr. Johnson teaches that the way to enhance or save a relationship is to be open, attuned, and responsive to each other and to reestablish emotional connection. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship and uses them as touch points for seven healing conversations, including: Recognizing the Demon Dialogues Finding the Raw Spots Revisiting a Rocky Moment Forgiving Injuries Keeping Your Love Alive These conversations give you insight into the defining moments in your relationship and guide you in reshaping these moments to create a secure and lasting bond. Through stories from Dr. Johnson’s practice, illuminating advice, and practical exercises, you will learn how to nurture, protect, and grow your relationship, ensuring a lifetime of love. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Premarital Counseling Robert F. Stahmann, William J. Hiebert, 1980 |
| couples therapy questions at home: Here's the Plan. Allyson Downey, 2016-04-05 For many women in their 20's and 30's, the greatest professional hurdle they'll need to overcome has little to do with their work life. The most focused, confident, and ambitious women can find themselves derailed by a tiny little thing: a new baby. While more workplaces are espousing family-friendly cultures, women are still subject to a parenting penalty and high-profile conflicts between parenting and the workplace are all over the news: from the controversy over companies covering the costs of egg-freezing to the debate over parental leave and childcare inspired by Marissa Mayer's policies at Yahoo. Here's the Plan offers an inventive and inspiring roadmap for working mothers steering their careers through the parenting years. Author Allyson Downey, founder of weeSpring, the Yelp for baby products,” and mother of two young children advises readers on all practical aspects of ladder-climbing while parenting, such as negotiating leave, flex time, and promotions. In the style of #GIRLBOSS or Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office, Here's the Plan is the definitive guide for ambitious mothers, written by one working mother to another. |
| couples therapy questions at home: 365 Questions For Couples Michael J Beck, Stanis Marusak Beck, Seanna Beck, 1998-03-01 What does he really think? How many things would you like to know—but don't—about your partner? Do you wish your partner would ask you about your past, your goals, your inner thoughts? When was the last time the two of you shared a dream, a memory, or a fantasy together? 365 Questions for Couples shows you how to get closer to your partner by asking and answering thought-provoking questions on such subjects as: Your relationship Relationship with others Goals and fantasies Life experiences Memories Sex Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. The only rule is that you cannot ask a question that you refuse to answer yourself. So put some quiet time aside, make yourself comfortable, and enter together into the world of goals, dreams, emotions, and your previously hidden past! |
| couples therapy questions at home: 201 Relationship Questions Barrie Davenport, 2015-09-03 Building a trusting, close bond requires communication, mutual respect and a bit of compromise. By understanding each other's needs and desires, you create a safe, loving couple bubble to protect your bond and make it stronger. Mutual questioning is a powerful technique to draw out deeper emotions and desires and address potential areas of conflict. The right questions inspire compassion and action for positive change. 201 Relationship Questions is your guide to creating a happier, healthier, sexier, and more intimate connection. Share each question, invite discussion, and keep a personal journal of the actions and changes you want to make. Set aside sacred time together for questions each day, and keep your relationship fresh and exciting for a lifetime -- Back cover. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Mating in Captivity Esther Perel, 2007-10-30 One of the world’s most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home. Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Handbook of Couples Therapy Michele Harway, 2005-01-21 The essential guide to successful couples therapy at every stage ofthe lifecycle A variety of therapeutic interventions can help couples developthe tools for a successful relationship. Yet many practitionersbegin seeing couples without extensive training in couples work. Tofill this gap in their therapeutic repertoires, noted couplestherapist Michele Harway brings together other well-known expertsin marriage and family therapy to offer the Handbook of CouplesTherapy, a comprehensive guide to the study and practice of couplestherapy. The book's chapters provide a variety of perspectives alongdevelopmental, theoretical, and situational lines. Recognizing theneed for clinically proven, evidence-based approaches, chaptersprovide detailed coverage of the most effective treatment modes.Couples at different stages of the lifecycle feature prominently inthe text, as do relevant special issues and treatment approachesfor each stage. Subjects covered include: Premarital counseling from the PAIRS perspective (an extensivecurriculum of interventions for premarital couples) The first years of marital commitment Couples with young children Couples with adolescents Therapy with older couples Same sex couples A variety of theoretical approaches, includingCognitive-Behavioral, Object Relational, Narrative, Integrative,and Feminist and Contextual Special issues and situations, including serious illness,physical aggression, addiction, infidelity, and religious/spiritualcommitments or conflicts Providing a diverse set of treatment approaches suited to workingwith a wide range of adult populations, the Handbook of CouplesTherapy is an essential resource for mental healthprofessionals working with couples. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Imago Relationship Therapy Mo Therese Hannah, 2005-03-11 Imago Relationship Therapy It's been more than three decades since Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt—the best-selling authors of Getting the Love You Want and Keeping the Love You Find—created Imago Relationship Therapy. Their concept of the conscious marriage introduced a new paradigm for understanding the dynamics of couples. Since that time more than two thousand clinicians in twenty-eight countries have adopted and implemented this highly effective form of couples therapy. This groundbreaking book offers an overview of the highly successful Imago Relationship Therapy (IRT) and the relationship of IRT with preceding schools of thought such as psychoanalytic theory, family systems theories, affect theory, and self-psychology. At the heart of IRT is a three-step process involving mirroring (reflecting) the partner's feelings, validating the partner's point of view, and expressing empathy toward the partner's feelings. Imago Relationship Therapy traces IRT's history and explosive growth and outlines the differences and similarities between Imago theory and other models of couples therapy. The book also presents some of the ideas of prominent Imago thinkers, such as the central role of connectivity and the problem of envy in committed relationships. A uniquely important book for the practitioner, which provides clinical wisdom and a rare look into the heart and soul of Imago Relationship Therapy. —Pat Love, Ed.D., author, The Truth About Love |
| couples therapy questions at home: Couples Therapy for Domestic Violence Sandra M. Stith, Eric E. McCollum, Karen H. Rosen, 2011 Up to 65% of couples who seek therapy for marital problems have had at least one prior violent episode. Unfortunately, therapists often miss this critical information because they do not effectively assess for it. This book presents a safety-focused approach to assessment and treatment of couples who choose to remain together after one or both partners have been violent. Treatment options for intimate partner violence have evolved alongside the growing awareness and broader definitions of domestic violence. Since 1997 the authors have conducted Domestic Violence Focused Couples Treatment (DVFCT), collected data, and refined their program. The authors outline their assessment and screening process and share case illustrations to demonstrate when conjoint treatment can be a safe and viable option. Readers get an overview of the 18-session course of DVFCT and tips for adapting it for multi-couple groups or for a single couple. The major tenets of solution-focused therapy, such as underscoring even the smallest of successes, are emphasized throughout, as are the following special features: -safety planning -mindfulness techniques for anger awareness and reduction -negotiated time-out procedures -drug and alcohol use modules -psychoeducational tools and materials on violence Therapists will learn how to assess intimate partner violence and help couples eliminate all forms of violence and begin on a positive path toward their vision of a healthy relationship. |
| couples therapy questions at home: This Is How Your Marriage Ends Matthew Fray, 2022-03-22 A thoughtful, down-to-earth, contemporary guide to help partners identify and address relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives. Good people can be bad at relationships. One night during his divorce, after one too many vodkas and a call with a phone-in-therapist who told him to “journal his feelings,” Matthew Fray started a blog. He needed to figure out how his ex-wife went from the eighteen-year-old college freshman who adored him to the angry woman who thought he was an asshole and left him. As he pieced together the story of his marriage and its end, Matthew began to realize a hard truth: even though he was a decent guy, he was a bad husband. As he shared raw, uncomfortable, and darkly humorous first-person stories about the lessons he’d learned from his failed marriage, a peculiar thing happened. Matthew started to gain a following. In January 2016 a post he wrote—“She Divorced Me Because I left the Dishes by the Sink”—went viral and was read over four million times. Filtered through the lens of his own surprising, life-changing experience and his years counseling couples, This Is How Your Marriage Ends exposes the root problem of so many relationships that go wrong. We simply haven’t been taught any of the necessary skills, Matthew explains. In fact, it is sometimes the assumption that we are acting on good intentions that causes us to alienate our partners and foment mistrust. With the humorous, entertaining, and counterintuitive approach of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, and the practical insights of The 5 Love Languages, This is How Your Marriage Ends helps readers identify relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives, and offers solutions to break free from the cycles of dysfunction and destruction. It is must-read for every partner no matter what stage–beginning, middle, or even end—of your relationship. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Should I Stay Or Go? Lee Raffel, 1999 Until now, couples facing the dilemma of deciding whether or not to stay in an unhappy marriage had three options: individual or couples therapy, separation, or divorce. Should I Stay or Go? provides these couples with a fourth option--the Controlled Separation (CS). CS is a compassionate process that is designed to build respect and foster advocacy between spouses. The book explains the CS guidelines, including the 12 fundamental issues that must be resolved for a workable, orderly separation. It also contains sample contracts, along with helpful checklists and self-assessment tools. |
| couples therapy questions at home: I Want This to Work Elizabeth Earnshaw, 2023-06-13 A contemporary, culturally inclusive, and easy-to-digest relationship book for the modern age Today’s generation is changing the rules about committed relationships—and looking to create more meaning within their lives. We are more selective before getting married, with more diverse families and family structures, and we’ve seen a significant drop in divorce rates. In this new environment, what couples need more than ever are effective, flexible tools to communicate, navigate hard times, and create deeper connections with each other. Renowned Gottman therapist Elizabeth Earnshaw has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents her most timely and proven steps for relationship success. “We’re in a cultural moment,” she says, “where people are hungry to absorb the principles for healthy relationships. This book answers that call.” Here, couples will learn how to work with the three challenges they must tackle to repair and strengthen their relationships: conflict, healing, and connection. In a supportive and relatable voice, Elizabeth simplifies complex concepts and provides core insights, exercises, and reflections to take these tested principles from the page and into real life. Culturally tuned in, LGBTQIA+ friendly, and written for both married and unmarried couples, this new paperback edition of I Want This to Work brings us an accessible guide to relationship healing and creating enduring intimacy. |
| couples therapy questions at home: Relationship Workbook for Couples Rachel Stone, 2019-04 It may seem obvious to you that good communication is the foundation of every healthy, functioning relationship. Good communication skills will positively impact all of the relationships in your life, but this book will focus primarily on the practices that will have the greatest impact on the unique bond you share with your partner. You can aim to use these tools throughout your personal life, with friends and co-workers and family members--but regardless of how you incorporate these ideas into your day-to-day life, you and your partner should make a concerted effort to use these skills as you complete any of the questionnaires, quizzes or activities you find in this book. You may find a number of the questions to be challenging or provocative--they are intended to be! But you will find that with a toolbox of positive communication skills and a game plan to handle conflict, even the most nerve-wracking discussions will become manageable with your partner. Perhaps they'll even become easy and comfortable, once you are well-practiced with these skills. This book was designed with the intention of making the concepts of couples' therapy accessible to those who cannot find the time, money, or transport to reach a therapist's office. It also aims to make this work as simple, easy, and enjoyable as possible. Some chapters may pose challenging questions that expose difficulties in your relationship, while many others will offer fun, stress-free interactive exercises that you'll want to incorporate into date nights or lazy weekend mornings together. The concepts included can be applied to any relationship, whether your partnership is weeks, months, years, or decades old. You'll find activities designed for couples to use together, but you'll also find questionnaires to complete on your own which will help you to clarify your goals, both as an individual and as half of a partnership. This is a great book to keep handy at your bedside table or to carry with you and squeeze in a few minutes of relationship work wherever and whenever you can find time. This Workbook will provide you with: *Useful insights into what makes any romantic partnership successful and satisfying *Strategies, tools, questionnaires, and quizzes to discover, pursue and realize your personal relationship goals *Guided questions to help you learn more about yourself and your partner *Advanced exercises that aim at improving connection, trust, and intimacy within the couple *Suggestions on how to keep the unique relationship you share thriving for many years to come Regardless of your compatibility--whether you like the same colors, foods, movies, music, hobbies or friends--the health of your relationship will ultimately be determined by your willingness to invest in its future success. Keep asking questions and let yourself be open to unexpected answers. Don't look any further, scroll up, click add to cart and start your journey to a better relationship now |
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